Alright Lawyers...Assemble!

[JamieDimonsBalls]

Who's going to win this case? My guess is the plaintiff, even though he's a moron.

Makers of Texas Pete hot sauce face lawsuit over product being made in North Carolina

A lawsuit filed against Texas Pete hot sauce claims that makers knowingly capitalized on consumers’ desire for authentic Texan cuisine.

www.usatoday.com

 

[anon_6hv78pr714xta]

Who's going to win this case? My guess is the plaintiff, even though he's a moron.

Makers of Texas Pete hot sauce face lawsuit over product being made in North Carolina

A lawsuit filed against Texas Pete hot sauce claims that makers knowingly capitalized on consumers’ desire for authentic Texan cuisine.

www.usatoday.com

Define "win."

It won't go to trial. They will settle for nuisance value or it will be dismissed or SJ'd out.

It's a terrible claim. But the lawyers already got paid by getting their firm name in the USA Today article. Free advertising. I hate lawyers like this.

 

[anon_mlxxvlbug9dpa]

Who's going to win this case? My guess is the plaintiff, even though he's a moron.

Makers of Texas Pete hot sauce face lawsuit over product being made in North Carolina

A lawsuit filed against Texas Pete hot sauce claims that makers knowingly capitalized on consumers’ desire for authentic Texan cuisine.

www.usatoday.com

Texas Pete sucks. Case closed.

 

[outside shooter]

The product's label states clearly that it is manufactured in North Carolina. There is no labeling claiming it to be Texas-made or even based on a Texas recipe. A guy can be nicknamed Tex and live anywhere.

if you buy it thinking that it was made elsewhere, then that's on you.

IANAL, but I don't see this as winnable, at all.

 

[Marvin the Martian]

This sort of lawsuit happens too often. But someone will settle. Honestly, why would someone sue over something this ridiculous..

 

[larsIU]

Honestly, why would someone sue over something this ridiculous..

Spoiler

But someone will settle

 

[anon_6hv78pr714xta]

This sort of lawsuit happens too often. But someone will settle. Honestly, why would someone sue over something this ridiculous..

The problem is that every single one of these suits generates press coverage. So they don't really happen as much as you think, if you are thinking that the ones you hear about are the tip of the iceberg.

I know some of the guys who brought the Starbucks suit alleging the reported sizing in oz.s was wrong because of the ice. They aren't good lawyers but thought they'd generate some press. And they did. No clue if that will result in clients for them.

 

[Sope Creek]

We use Louisiana Hot Sauce in our BBQ sauce and I think this claim is garbage. The sauce isn't called Texas . . . it's called Texas Pete. Maybe Pete moved to North Carolina and took a Texas recipe with him.

I remember once I had a case in small claims court where my client - a builder - sold a "new" house to a family. The house had been rented for 6 months after completion and the tenant had a dog living in the house. The plaintiff family said that this was a breach of an implied warranty that the house had never been lived in. The judge - who had an IU basketball connection - said "let's all just go home".

My sense is that the Texas Pete case isn't as viable as the one on which we got a directed verdict without putting on any evidence.

 

[Sope Creek]

Spoiler

But someone will settle

I used to tell my corporate clients that they could settle a sexual harassment claim for $50k and likely get a nuisance settlement or they could spend the money on lawyers preparing for a summary judgment motion, and spend $50k on that. (@MyTeamIsOnTheFloor) Either way the $50k was a sunk cost. Their choice.

Interestingly, most of the clients wanted to go for the summary judgment if the facts were good . . . as a disincentive to other wannabe plaintiffs. They were happy to roll the dice for that outcome.

 

[MyTeamIsOnTheFloor]

I used to tell my corporate clients that they could settle a sexual harassment claim for $50k and likely get a nuisance settlement or they could spend the money on lawyers preparing for a summary judgment motion, and spend $50k on that. (@MyTeamIsOnTheFloor) Either way the $50k was a sunk cost. Their choice.

Interestingly, most of the clients wanted to go for the summary judgment if the facts were good . . . as a disincentive to other wannabe plaintiffs. They were happy to roll the dice for that outcome.

I’d spend $100,000 to drive the settlement down to $10,000 and feed the “we did nothing wrong” beast.

 

[Noodle]

Texas Pete wins if they take it to trial. Simple case. Only an idiot would think the name "Texas Pete" means the product is made in Texas. Only a moronic attorney would argue that someone actually cares whether the hot sauce is made in Texas or North Carolina.

 

[Sope Creek]

I’d spend $100,000 to drive the settlement down to $10,000 and feed the “we did nothing wrong” beast.

Would it be your firm getting the $100k?

 

[MyTeamIsOnTheFloor]

Texas Pete wins if they take it to trial. Simple case. Only an idiot would think the name "Texas Pete" means the product is made in Texas. Only a moronic attorney would argue that someone actually cares whether the hot sauce is made in Texas or North Carolina.

So all California Club sandwiches aren't from California?

 

[MyTeamIsOnTheFloor]

Would it be your firm getting the $100k?

Oh yeah. I got diddly/squat. Firm policy.

 

[Sope Creek]

So all California Club sandwiches aren't from California?

Nope. They have avocado spreads. That's enough to make 'em into California sammiches.

 

[Sope Creek]

Oh yeah. I got diddly/squat. Firm policy.

No client/fee origination bonuses?

What kind of a business is that?

 

[mcmurtry66]

The problem is that every single one of these suits generates press coverage. So they don't really happen as much as you think, if you are thinking that the ones you hear about are the tip of the iceberg.

I know some of the guys who brought the Starbucks suit alleging the reported sizing in oz.s was wrong because of the ice. They aren't good lawyers but thought they'd generate some press. And they did. No clue if that will result in clients for them.

It absolutely generates clients. For better or worse. Probably worse. Have you heard of Bob Montgomery. Ron Motley? Sheldon Schlesinger? Jack Scarola? Some of the best tort lawyers and litigators of the last 25 years. Probably not. Coolest courtroom I’ve ever been in was in Sheldon’s office. They get cases from other lawyers. Hell in your old part of the world old handshake Joe would be drowned out today. But everyone knows Morgan and Morgan. Advertising. Hell they were one of the first calls in the condo collapse. They have over 800 lawyers now. That was unheard of 20 years ago for a plaintiffs’ firm. As you know advertising has changed tort law. Significantly. That’s where Joe public goes. That’s all this is. Advertising. Advertising ruined plaintiffs’ work. It turned lawyers into car salesman and the public treats them accordingly. My entire business is funded by my old law partners who are praying it gets them out someday. Out of our core group of friends from IU less than half practice law now. They got out

 

[Noodle]

So all California Club sandwiches aren't from California?

No, all of those are made in California.

 

[Joe_Hoopsier]

Frank(s)ly, this puts that shit stain on everything, legal profession wise.

 

[larsIU]

No, all of those are made in California.

Is that why the wait is an hour on Uber Eats. Figures.

 

[JamieDimonsBalls]

Texas Pete sucks. Case closed.

 

[JamieDimonsBalls]

Define "win."

It won't go to trial. They will settle for nuisance value or it will be dismissed or SJ'd out.

It's a terrible claim. But the lawyers already got paid by getting their firm name in the USA Today article. Free advertising. I hate lawyers like this.

Is this @mcmurtry66 's style?

 

[JamieDimonsBalls]

This sort of lawsuit happens too often. But someone will settle. Honestly, why would someone sue over something this ridiculous..

one of the benefits and drawbacks of being in America

 

[mcmurtry66]

LMAO. court was the only part of law i liked. and i liked that part a lot. court and depos. and hearings in chambers. i liked most of the judges quite a bit. they were largely just down to earth people who were burned out lawyers and sick of whatever their station was in law. the clients. discovery. the paperwork was horrible. doing the actual day to day work was horrible. and no offense to lars but i got where i hated most of the adjusters too. i'd lose my temper real bad with them. so i talked my partners into a get rich scheme that hasn't made us rich

Is this @mcmurtry66 's style?

 

[mcmurtry66]

Is this @mcmurtry66 's style?

Oh and i liked paralegals most. i liked that most about law. and happy hour. happy hour and paralegals

 

[JamieDimonsBalls]

so i talked my partners into a get rich scheme that hasn't made us rich

LOL, I imagine this is that one young partner trying to right the ship...

 

[JamieDimonsBalls]

Oh and i liked paralegals most. i liked that most about law. and happy hour. happy hour and paralegals

Paralegals... don't they all look like this?

 

[mcmurtry66]

Paralegals... don't they all look like this?

Depends on who is hiring. Ugh. I always think of frank from always sunny

 

[MyTeamIsOnTheFloor]

No client/fee origination bonuses?

What kind of a business is that?

Former.

 

[larsIU]

LMAO. court was the only part of law i liked. and i liked that part a lot. court and depos. and hearings in chambers. i liked most of the judges quite a bit. they were largely just down to earth people who were burned out lawyers and sick of whatever their station was in law. the clients. discovery. the paperwork was horrible. doing the actual day to day work was horrible. and no offense to lars but i got where i hated most of the adjusters too. i'd lose my temper real bad with them. so i talked my partners into a get rich scheme that hasn't made us rich

Man we kept sheets on all the attorneys in CT and MA. Had a spreadsheet on a shared drive where we entered notes on each one. Pulled their pics from the websites. Wasn’t so scary arguing with an attorney when he was some portly dude with bad hair.

I miss it sometimes. Always appreciated you could get in a heated argument with another human and nobody called your boss to complain.

Favorite attorney was a guy in CT. Hated it. Everything you just bitches about. Hated the clients. First guy I heard talk about it being a sales job and that was in like 2008. I swear we’d be in the phone for about an hour just shooting the shit while he was at his condo in FL. Might settle one or two cases.

Good times. By the way, I liked the paralegals better too.

 

[mcmurtry66]

Man we kept sheets on all the attorneys in CT and MA. Had a spreadsheet on a shared drive where we entered notes on each one. Pulled their pics from the websites. Wasn’t so scary arguing with an attorney when he was some portly dude with bad hair.

I miss it sometimes. Always appreciated you could get in a heated argument with another human and nobody called your boss to complain.

Favorite attorney was a guy in CT. Hated it. Everything you just bitches about. Hated the clients. First guy I heard talk about it being a sales job and that was in like 2008. I swear we’d be in the phone for about an hour just shooting the shit while he was at his condo in FL. Might settle one or two cases.

Good times. By the way, I liked the paralegals better too.

HAHAHA i love this. i always was so interested in "pulling back the curtain" and seeing what these damn adjusters could see. when i started hearing about abacus that set me off real bad. what was it. who has it. say contusion don't say bruise. never chiro always pt. and i'd get real mad. YOU'RE NOT A F*UCKING DOCTOR!!!!! DON'T TELL ME ABOUT WHAT A JURY WILL DO!! YOU'RE NOT A F*UCKING LAWYER. THEN FAX ME YOUR LAW DEGREE. THEN FAX ME YOUR MEDICAL DEGREE. I'm going to the fax machine to wait. No. You know what. No more more of you. Get me your supervisor TWO LEVELS UP. NO!!!! TWO LEVELS UP!!! hello? oh my god this mother f*ucker did not just hang up on me. You know what i'm going to do now. nothin. absolutely nothin. game on. i'm going to sit on this file for four years and 364 days. then i'm going to file. then i'm going to do nothing until i get a motion for sanctions because i won't respond to anything. then i'm going to dismiss without. then i'm going to sit on the savings statute for 364 days. then i'm going to refile. I'll have this f*ucker on their books for a decade. that'll show em. but yes i did get to like a lot of the adjusters. guys and girls who i am sure were like you. some would just go straight to their best or file. that's when you knew you were buds.

awful. awful awful awful

 

[TheOriginalHappyGoat]

At my old restaurant, we had these really nice chairs that the owner's brother (a master carpenter) had made for us. They were sturdy as hell, although I have no idea if he actually did any stress tests on them. Anyway, one night some, ahem, large woman leaned back in her chair and snapped the back legs off. She only fell about two feet, but two feet is a long distance for that much weight, so she claimed injury. My boss really wanted to fight it with the time-honored "fat and stupid" defense, but the insurance company refused. It was cheaper for them to just write her a check.

 

[MyTeamIsOnTheFloor]

HAHAHA i love this. i always was so interested in "pulling back the curtain" and seeing what these damn adjusters could see. when i started hearing about abacus that set me off real bad. what was it. who has it. say contusion don't say bruise. never chiro always pt. and i'd get real mad. YOU'RE NOT A F*UCKING DOCTOR!!!!! DON'T TELL ME ABOUT WHAT A JURY WILL DO!! YOU'RE NOT A F*UCKING LAWYER. THEN FAX ME YOUR LAW DEGREE. THEN FAX ME YOUR MEDICAL DEGREE. I'm going to the fax machine to wait. No. You know what. No more more of you. Get me your supervisor TWO LEVELS UP. NO!!!! TWO LEVELS UP!!! hello? oh my god this mother f*ucker did not just hang up on me. You know what i'm going to do now. nothin. absolutely nothin. game on. i'm going to sit on this file for four years and 364 days. then i'm going to file. then i'm going to do nothing until i get a motion for sanctions because i won't respond to anything. then i'm going to dismiss without. then i'm going to sit on the savings statute for 364 days. then i'm going to refile. I'll have this f*ucker on their books for a decade. that'll show em. but yes i did get to like a lot of the adjusters. guys and girls who i am sure were like you. some would just go straight to their best or file. that's when you knew you were buds.

awful. awful awful awful

Hates the nasty little Sackville Bagginses

 

[larsIU]

some would just go straight to their best or file. that's when you knew you were buds.

It's high up there on the list of reasons i left for good.

1. Workload just got to be unmanageable w/o working 70 hours a week. Sorry you don't pay me enough.
2. yeah, there was State Farm's Collossus (or something like that). They got sued. Settlement was like 50 mil back in the early aughts. I'm sure they paid it laughing all the way to the bank. It's now called LET (Liability/Evaluation Tool). I guess it's different enough from Collossus that the carriers have dodged the lawsuits, for now. It felt dirty.
3. I hated the "forced liability offsets" which were crap and the whole idea of stair stepping offers. Christ what nonsense. Once I knew most of the attorneys I would just say take it or leave it, I don't care (and I didn't).

 

[mcmurtry66]

It's high up there on the list of reasons i left for good.

1. Workload just got to be unmanageable w/o working 70 hours a week. Sorry you don't pay me enough.
2. yeah, there was State Farm's Collossus (or something like that). They got sued. Settlement was like 50 mil back in the early aughts. I'm sure they paid it laughing all the way to the bank. It's now called LET (Liability/Evaluation Tool). I guess it's different enough from Collossus that the carriers have dodged the lawsuits, for now. It felt dirty.
3. I hated the "forced liability offsets" which were crap and the whole idea of stair stepping offers. Christ what nonsense. Once I knew most of the attorneys I would just say take it or leave it, I don't care (and I didn't).

Yes collossus that was it!! Lol. What a game

 

[outside shooter]

There's a long list of sushi restaurants that I could sue over their so-called "California Rolls" so.... who here wants to take my case?

 

[mcmurtry66]

It's high up there on the list of reasons i left for good.

1. Workload just got to be unmanageable w/o working 70 hours a week. Sorry you don't pay me enough.
2. yeah, there was State Farm's Collossus (or something like that). They got sued. Settlement was like 50 mil back in the early aughts. I'm sure they paid it laughing all the way to the bank. It's now called LET (Liability/Evaluation Tool). I guess it's different enough from Collossus that the carriers have dodged the lawsuits, for now. It felt dirty.
3. I hated the "forced liability offsets" which were crap and the whole idea of stair stepping offers. Christ what nonsense. Once I knew most of the attorneys I would just say take it or leave it, I don't care (and I didn't).

I like when the settlement check wouldn’t show up too. I used to think they did that on purpose. So I’d call and leave endless messages. Hi Betty. How are you. I was calling about my settlement check. We still haven’t received it. It’s been three weeks AND I WANT MY THIRTY THREE AND ONE THIRD PERCENT OF SEVENTEEN THOUSAND FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS BETTY! WE’RE NOT PLAYING THE HIDE THE CHECK GAME BETTY!!!! SEND ME MY F*UCKING MONEY!!!! whatever. Come on Betty. Get me my money. Goodbye.

 

[Crayfish57]

I'm thinking potential income from French Fry suits is way bigger

 

[larsIU]

I like when the settlement check wouldn’t show up too. I used to think they did that on purpose. So I’d call and leave endless messages. Hi Betty. How are you. I was calling about my settlement check. We still haven’t received it. It’s been three weeks AND I WANT MY THIRTY THREE AND ONE THIRD PERCENT OF SEVENTEEN THOUSAND FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS BETTY! WE’RE NOT PLAYING THE HIDE THE CHECK GAME BETTY!!!! SEND ME MY F*UCKING MONEY!!!! whatever. Come on Betty. Get me my money. Goodbye.

Some attorney were such fiends they'd demand we overnight it. I realized later it was the fastest way for them to get rid of the client.

Realizing that made me never overnight a check again.

Damn, I miss the game.

Last story, attorney in CT with the last name Romania. Except he'd get pissed if you called him the country. He'd correct you and say "It's RO MAIN YA".

He called another adjuster a "claims terrorist". He was a bit unhinged.

 

[mcmurtry66]

Some attorney were such fiends they'd demand we overnight it. I realized later it was the fastest way for them to get rid of the client.

Realizing that made me never overnight a check again.

Damn, I miss the game.

Last story, attorney in CT with the last name Romania. Except he'd get pissed if you called him the country. He'd correct you and say "It's RO MAIN YA".

He called another adjuster a "claims terrorist". He was a bit unhinged.

That is hilarious!! I’d make them overnight it a lot. I remember when State Farm turned to teams. You had an adjuster. One guy. Who’d call you back in an hour then all of the sudden they converted to teams and no one would return a call. Team 15. F*uck!!!!!!!
At one point we were top five in the city for the number of files we had. Animals. There were no words for how much I got to hate it.