to be liked by this place.
Is this thing on?
Making the Sweet 16 in a popularity contest of divorcees, potheads, deviants, and lawyers is a practice in mediocrity at a high, high level. So I'd like to congratulate you morons on your grand achievement. This will no doubt go down as the best moment of yet another sad, sad year in your pitiful lives.
Some wonder why I'd like to come here and stare you right in the eyes. I hear you don't like me here. I don't know - I haven't seen the stats yet.
But it's easy. Same reason that I looked that Doyel idiot in the eye after he called me out after the Holt deal. Toughness. It's about building a mentality. I'm pretty sure I read about this in a Malcolm Gladwell book at one point or another.
Real quick aside - where is that C-$ idiot? YOU RUINED THE PROGRAM. YOU RUINED THE PROGRAM WITH YOUR DESTINY AND EXPECTATIONS AND "MY MARQUETTE FRIEND SAID THIS". YOU RUINED THE PROGRAM, AND NOW YOU'RE BANNED. AGAIN.
Phew - now that's over and we can get back to why we're really here.
To congratulate you, I'd like to present you with your own commemorative:
Sweet 16 Banner! If you're looking for these in the Hall, look right next to the "7th not 11th" and "Body of Work" banners in the new expansion.
If you're wondering why it looks like it was designed by a 5 year old, that's because it was designed with speed and tempo in mind. I photoshop at a low, low level.
You'll also receive your very own bumper sticker noting the occasion. Smack this right on the side of your double-wide trailer, since I know none of you idiots actually have time to hold down a legit job. Where the hell do you find time to make 15,000 posts no one actually reads? It's almost like you want your wives and husbands to sign up for Match.com.
Finally, I'm offering each of you a scholarship to play for us next year. Don't worry - you'll all start, I promise. We have plenty of room.
Now, I know you're wondering where your Sweet 16 rings are. I would be too.
The truth is that I had them made, but Stanford's taking them with him to Xavier. You know, to a school that's actually in the Sweet 16.
I asked the team to watch over them for you, but you and I both know they can't defend sh*t.
Well, it's been nice visiting with you but I'm off to another meeting with my agent. Look forward to visiting with you again next Spring after Adidas' own Thon Maker leads us to a Sweet 16 and me to another fat contract with a huge buyout from Daddy Fred.
Until then, stay young and go dancing.
(Roll tide.)
This post was edited on 3/26 11:19 AM by Oxford Collapse
This post was edited on 3/26 11:20 AM by Oxford Collapse
This post was edited on 3/26 2:20 PM by Oxford Collapse
This post was edited on 3/26 4:12 PM by Oxford Collapse
This post was edited on 3/26 4:14 PM by Oxford Collapse
This post was edited on 3/26 4:16 PM by Oxford Collapse
Is this thing on?
Making the Sweet 16 in a popularity contest of divorcees, potheads, deviants, and lawyers is a practice in mediocrity at a high, high level. So I'd like to congratulate you morons on your grand achievement. This will no doubt go down as the best moment of yet another sad, sad year in your pitiful lives.
Some wonder why I'd like to come here and stare you right in the eyes. I hear you don't like me here. I don't know - I haven't seen the stats yet.
But it's easy. Same reason that I looked that Doyel idiot in the eye after he called me out after the Holt deal. Toughness. It's about building a mentality. I'm pretty sure I read about this in a Malcolm Gladwell book at one point or another.
Real quick aside - where is that C-$ idiot? YOU RUINED THE PROGRAM. YOU RUINED THE PROGRAM WITH YOUR DESTINY AND EXPECTATIONS AND "MY MARQUETTE FRIEND SAID THIS". YOU RUINED THE PROGRAM, AND NOW YOU'RE BANNED. AGAIN.
Phew - now that's over and we can get back to why we're really here.
To congratulate you, I'd like to present you with your own commemorative:
Sweet 16 Banner! If you're looking for these in the Hall, look right next to the "7th not 11th" and "Body of Work" banners in the new expansion.
If you're wondering why it looks like it was designed by a 5 year old, that's because it was designed with speed and tempo in mind. I photoshop at a low, low level.
You'll also receive your very own bumper sticker noting the occasion. Smack this right on the side of your double-wide trailer, since I know none of you idiots actually have time to hold down a legit job. Where the hell do you find time to make 15,000 posts no one actually reads? It's almost like you want your wives and husbands to sign up for Match.com.
Finally, I'm offering each of you a scholarship to play for us next year. Don't worry - you'll all start, I promise. We have plenty of room.
Now, I know you're wondering where your Sweet 16 rings are. I would be too.
The truth is that I had them made, but Stanford's taking them with him to Xavier. You know, to a school that's actually in the Sweet 16.
I asked the team to watch over them for you, but you and I both know they can't defend sh*t.
Well, it's been nice visiting with you but I'm off to another meeting with my agent. Look forward to visiting with you again next Spring after Adidas' own Thon Maker leads us to a Sweet 16 and me to another fat contract with a huge buyout from Daddy Fred.
Until then, stay young and go dancing.
(Roll tide.)
This post was edited on 3/26 11:19 AM by Oxford Collapse
This post was edited on 3/26 11:20 AM by Oxford Collapse
This post was edited on 3/26 2:20 PM by Oxford Collapse
This post was edited on 3/26 4:12 PM by Oxford Collapse
This post was edited on 3/26 4:14 PM by Oxford Collapse
This post was edited on 3/26 4:16 PM by Oxford Collapse
