Advice on passing a drug screen
- Thread starter HermanB
- Start date
Don't get your mom to pee in a bottle for you, because she is pretty high on my dick right now.
Seriously, there's a thread about a month old that covers this topic. Your local head shop is also a good starting place.
Give the denizens here more details: is it just a piss test, or is it hair?
Give the denizens here more details: is it just a piss test, or is it hair?
He says "piss test" right there in the post, man. Pay attention.
Or are you high right now?
Shave your eyebrows and then put your thumb up your ass. Drink and water and sweat.
Go buy a home piss test from the pharmacy. buy two. Test yourself now then again before the actual. Drink water and sweat until you're clean. On day of test quit drinking water, drink coffee, take 8 aspirin an hour before. Never give morning piss, want to piss at least twice before. Don't give beginning or end stream only middle. < this is very important.
Always use synthetic urine. There are very smart people making fake pee that you can buy at your local head shop. Almost idiot proof. It contains uric acid as well. I've used this many times.
http://www.quickfixurine.com
http://www.quickfixurine.com
Used it many times? How many drug tests have you had to do?
I have had 1 drug test in my life. That was in 1997.
19 years later I'm not thinking about buying fake pee.
I've taken two, both during my daily stoner days, passed both.
For one I took test clean and for the other nothing.
It's a scam.
I had a friend who lost a job with a major company after offer/acceptance because he failed a pee test for tweeds.
Find someone you know that doesn't smoke and have them piss in something. Transfer it to one of those 8oz ice mountain bottles. you can store the piss in your fridge for a week before you go if you need to.
Make sure you get the bottle out and let it get to room temp, and about an hour before you leave for your test tape it on your thigh. The only thing they are gonna check for at the time is the temp of the urine. If you tape it to your thigh an hour before it will be plenty of time for it to adjust to your core temp. Don't over think this part, just want to get it close to 98.6 (they give you plenty of leeway in the temp) Don't do anything stupid and microwave it before you leave!
They will not watch you and have you go in a room by yourself. Simply poor it into their container. It is not risky at all, practice around the house before you go with it taped to your thigh.
I have done this twice. The second time I met a group of 10 coworkers and did the whole intro thing. I used a water bottle like thing, that wasn't taped, just securely balanced between my crotch......but I'm a professional. Much easier to simply tape a 8ozer to your inner thigh. Make sure you get a person of the same sex that has clean piss, that is the hardest part. You will thank me later, easy as pie!
For one thing, your refrigerator won't smell like urine.
Thank the Lord my life isn't pathetic enough that I've ever had to ask another human for their urine.
I bet that had to be a proud moment.
I'm sure the people you asked probably thought very highly of you.
Thank your lucky stars that they don't test for alcohol, which is indisputably a more destructive drug than cannabis.
I had a friend ask for my piss once. I never thought less of him because of it. WTF is wrong with you?
I wasnt making a statement about marijuana.
Just making a statement about having to ask another adult if I could have some of their urine.
I dont care if someone smokes weed. Im in favor of legalizing it.
Others here have posted ways of beating the tests (flushing the system, synthetic urine, etc)
I just dont want to be asking someone to pee and give it to me.
Quick fix has also failed people in multiple instances. Just go with 100% real, dehydrated urine. I used testclear and it worked perfectly.
I just went through the same thing in December. If you're 7 days away you should be fine. To be sure, you can get a detox drink that you take the morning of. Get the "Stinger 5x strength" product linked below. Follow the directions exactly as written. Until then limit your dairy products, drink lots of water, get plenty of exercise. On the day of the test try to take it in the afternoon. They usually give you a 48 hour window to take the test. Don't over drink water day of the test. Follow the directions exactly and you'll be fine.
Amazon product ASIN B005LCMW6C
Amazon product ASIN B005LCMW6C
Well the majority of them happened after Grad school when I got a job as a tour leader for TrekAmerica. Best. Job. Ever. You took foreigners on trips all over the US, Mexico & Canada. You drove a big 15 passenger van with 13 people, mostly chicks, and had to get a commercial driver's license. Along with that comes pee tests. Our company made you pee every 3 months and you also had to submit if you ever even had a tiny fender bender. I was 26 years old back then and driving all over the country banging hot european chicks. Then I'd wake up in Yosemite. Or Yellowstone. Or Nawlins. Or Vegas. It was badass. I probably had to pass between 12-15 pee tests back then.
Nowadays I only ever have to take one when I get a new job. So this has maybe happened 3 times since those tests way back when. So only 3 times in the past 13 years. That said, I still use synthetic every single time and it has worked for me every single time.
