No! You pervert; I said, "PRESSURE." Get your grubby mitts off that thing. STOP THAT! What would your Mum say if she saw you shaking that filthy, grub-eaten little stub? You'll stunt your growth, maybe pull what's left of the little fella off.
Besides, you're getting Cap all in a lather. See...he's drooling.
You shouldn't tease Cap like that. Shame on you. And where are your pants? Where'd you get those pink, satin panties you're wearing? No, don't tell me. I probably don't want to know.
Now, about Thursday... Take some deep breaths, calm yourself down. Relax. I'd give you a Xanax, but you're already so cross-eyed, you could pass for Egor in "Young Frankenstein." So just breathe. There, that's better, isn't it? No reason to panic. Let me help you.
You need a thesaurus, Uber, a big thick book with no pictures; it gives you words that mean the same things so you don't use up the twenty or thirty words you know, so you don't say the same things over and over again. No, this is NOT a thesaurus.
Sigh.
Uh oh. I said THAT word and Cap's name in the same post. Here comes CF** and some of his buddies.
See what you started... Oh great, SH is in the pack too, and he brought refreshments. What are they drinking?
NOOOOOOO!
C'mon now, Uber, just ignore those squeals, all that slapping -- you've got work to do. CJ's counting on you to cap off his big day Thursday. He even bought new wheels for the occasion, and you know how cheap he is. The car he bought is supposed to be elegant, long, sleek and sassy, a convertible limo, maybe. I know, you don't understand those big words, so let's just say it's really swell. Look, here it comes now...
Whaddya think? Won't his wife/sister/mother be proud of that ride?
What?
Yup, I agree. And she'll especially love the back seat mattress and the way those stains complement her complexion. Sorry, more big words.
Look...CJ shouldn't see us while we're talking about his bio. He'd probably tell you what to say, you know how he is. Let's duck down.
No, that's with a "D," Uber. Get off me.
Shhh... don't move, don't even breathe; he's almost here.
Boy, did you see that scowl?
Huh?
Nevermind. 'Nother big word. He musta had a bad day at work.
Poor bastage, must be hell to be surrounded by all those dead-head administrators all day. Oh well, if you do this thing right, Uber, you'll cheer him up. Stay down now, he still might see us.
There, he's pulled into his carport and entered the trailer. You can get up now, he's walking into the dumpster wing, looks like the dining area. I can see the flies. Those are big 'uns, more like bats.
What's that you say?
Yeah, I like the new yard sign too, really spunks up the place.
What?
I don't KNOW why there's an eerie blue glow.
Phew, what do I smell? Did something die around here? {Sniff, sniff.) Uber, have you been drinking again? Damn it, can't you stay sober long enough to do even a simple bio? Hell, the goober hasn't lived long enough or done anything to merit much more than "He came, he saw, he farted." Is THAT beyond you?
C'mere, let me smell your breath, you moron.
Ugh. Glurg. Blech. That's awful, worse than Teddy Kennedy after the office party, you know, all that whiskey and the stale sardines. You're disgusting.
What are you chewing? And why is your tongue pink? Where'd those panties go? WHY ARE YOU FREAKING NEKID?
That's sick, Uber, you cross-dressing, stub thumping, pink underwear stealing, poor excuse for a home-boy. That does it. I'm outta here. CJ is on his own.
Poor Peach, I bet she's drafty... Hope she doesn't catch cold.
My, my, just look at her... uh... goosebumps.
This post was edited on 4/27 7:23 AM by troverif(GetAdminCookie() != 0) {document.write(' (Revisions[/URL])');}
Besides, you're getting Cap all in a lather. See...he's drooling.
You shouldn't tease Cap like that. Shame on you. And where are your pants? Where'd you get those pink, satin panties you're wearing? No, don't tell me. I probably don't want to know.
Now, about Thursday... Take some deep breaths, calm yourself down. Relax. I'd give you a Xanax, but you're already so cross-eyed, you could pass for Egor in "Young Frankenstein." So just breathe. There, that's better, isn't it? No reason to panic. Let me help you.
You need a thesaurus, Uber, a big thick book with no pictures; it gives you words that mean the same things so you don't use up the twenty or thirty words you know, so you don't say the same things over and over again. No, this is NOT a thesaurus.
Sigh.
Uh oh. I said THAT word and Cap's name in the same post. Here comes CF** and some of his buddies.
See what you started... Oh great, SH is in the pack too, and he brought refreshments. What are they drinking?
NOOOOOOO!
C'mon now, Uber, just ignore those squeals, all that slapping -- you've got work to do. CJ's counting on you to cap off his big day Thursday. He even bought new wheels for the occasion, and you know how cheap he is. The car he bought is supposed to be elegant, long, sleek and sassy, a convertible limo, maybe. I know, you don't understand those big words, so let's just say it's really swell. Look, here it comes now...
Whaddya think? Won't his wife/sister/mother be proud of that ride?
What?
Yup, I agree. And she'll especially love the back seat mattress and the way those stains complement her complexion. Sorry, more big words.
Look...CJ shouldn't see us while we're talking about his bio. He'd probably tell you what to say, you know how he is. Let's duck down.
No, that's with a "D," Uber. Get off me.
Shhh... don't move, don't even breathe; he's almost here.
Boy, did you see that scowl?
Huh?
Nevermind. 'Nother big word. He musta had a bad day at work.
Poor bastage, must be hell to be surrounded by all those dead-head administrators all day. Oh well, if you do this thing right, Uber, you'll cheer him up. Stay down now, he still might see us.
There, he's pulled into his carport and entered the trailer. You can get up now, he's walking into the dumpster wing, looks like the dining area. I can see the flies. Those are big 'uns, more like bats.
What's that you say?
Yeah, I like the new yard sign too, really spunks up the place.
What?
I don't KNOW why there's an eerie blue glow.
Phew, what do I smell? Did something die around here? {Sniff, sniff.) Uber, have you been drinking again? Damn it, can't you stay sober long enough to do even a simple bio? Hell, the goober hasn't lived long enough or done anything to merit much more than "He came, he saw, he farted." Is THAT beyond you?
C'mere, let me smell your breath, you moron.
Ugh. Glurg. Blech. That's awful, worse than Teddy Kennedy after the office party, you know, all that whiskey and the stale sardines. You're disgusting.
What are you chewing? And why is your tongue pink? Where'd those panties go? WHY ARE YOU FREAKING NEKID?
That's sick, Uber, you cross-dressing, stub thumping, pink underwear stealing, poor excuse for a home-boy. That does it. I'm outta here. CJ is on his own.
Poor Peach, I bet she's drafty... Hope she doesn't catch cold.
My, my, just look at her... uh... goosebumps.
This post was edited on 4/27 7:23 AM by troverif(GetAdminCookie() != 0) {document.write(' (Revisions[/URL])');}
