So there I was, visting my friend in Injunapolis. And he says "have you ever been on the internet?"
"No" said I.
Because I hadn't.
I wuddn' lyin.
This was the first thing I looked at on the internet:
This was the second thing I looked at on the internet:
So I knew I had to get me some of that.
And I did:
I got me some of this:
and some of this:
and some more of this:
Unknowingly, the inevitable march toward the OTF had begun.
The next step was "chat rooms" (no, not those chat rooms).
Indy Star chat rooms.
Despite every other other post being from some kid talking about maternal sex of some kind, folks talked about IU football and IU hoops.
Most were idiots.
Some were not.
But that led me to 2 things - some guy named Bruce Strom ran a site about IU football (which I found by using this:
the web search engine of the uncommon man,
and some guy named Jack who wrote a newsletter about IU games and e-mailed it out to IU fans after IU hoops games, which I learned about from a guy at work. He got me on the e-mail list somehow. After I read the first one we talked, and he said "do you know about Peeks?" and I said "what?" He said "Peeks". I said "is that porn? He said no - "P-E-E-G-S dumbass - its a name. Some guy has a message board about IU basketball. I'll e-mail you the address."
It wasn't this one:
It wasn't even this one.
It was more "old timey internetty"
Substance over form.
Folks talking about IU hoops and recruiting, without the maternal sex.
What they called back then a "moderated message board".
Something like this:
only different.
I was a reader, not a poster.
I learned that was "lurking" , cause I'm smart and pick up on things like that.
And there were some names that were posting over and over and over.
Names I would see in the future.
Then something happened, and I was forced to lurk less and had to share my opinion:
I was agin that.
and it made posting hazardous.
Lemmings following each other off of cliffs.
Kool aid drinkers.
Lawsuits.
Midnight mailings.
People trying to get people fired.
People mailing crap to recruits.
People hatin.
THESE people:
My first meaningful post was a parody of Denny Crum hiding in the horse stables at the Kentucky State Fair, outside of Freedom Hall, using walkie talkies to signal plays to his former players being coached by Rick Pitina.
I was trying to support Mike Davis.
Rode that all the way to the crash site
Then,
unbeknownst to me, Peegs OK'd the creation of the OTF for folks who needed to escape the battle
It could be rough but it was obviously an on-line fraternity of smart assed folks say we come descended from monkeys! Even had one stunned.
So I lurked ...
until just the right moment...
when their blood was up ...
and they were on a roll ...
full throat insult mode ...
and I made my first OTF post:
"I hate everybody"
which drew first blood from Aruss
"?????"
and a "WTF?" from Dolfingus.
I revealed "I'm just trying to fit in"
and I disappeared.
but I had to lurk
where else could I find stuff like this:
or this
or better yet, this
My formal invitation came after my first milepost post, mile marker post, 5000th post.
I remember nothing about it.
But tunk (of all people) told me I should "post here more often."
I'm sure he regrets it.
For tunk:
Here, folks made confessions, told stories of colon explosions, attempted to make fun of the deaths of loved ones, begged for photos, voted for Megan, shared tuneage.
Here, I lost in the OTF Tourney to full frontal, then road head, then the ghey, then an off limit wife.
Here, I converse with commies, potheads, racists, crazy people, people who's posts bring the police to their house, dead-from-the-neck-up numbskulls, and , through it all
but that doesn't mean I wouldn't shoot you if I caught ya coming in the back door unannounced.
I've met a few of ya in person.
Liked everybody except ... well, you know who you are.
35,000 posts.
What a waste.
If you find yourself in jail in Louisville for a non-violent crime, I'll help raise bail money.
Are you not entertained?
Last word - listen to some hillbilly music now and then. It's good for the soul.
12-0.
Rose Bowl.
Vote for Megan!
"No" said I.
Because I hadn't.
I wuddn' lyin.
This was the first thing I looked at on the internet:
This was the second thing I looked at on the internet:
So I knew I had to get me some of that.
And I did:
I got me some of this:
and some of this:
and some more of this:
Unknowingly, the inevitable march toward the OTF had begun.
The next step was "chat rooms" (no, not those chat rooms).
Indy Star chat rooms.
Despite every other other post being from some kid talking about maternal sex of some kind, folks talked about IU football and IU hoops.
Most were idiots.
Some were not.
But that led me to 2 things - some guy named Bruce Strom ran a site about IU football (which I found by using this:
the web search engine of the uncommon man,
and some guy named Jack who wrote a newsletter about IU games and e-mailed it out to IU fans after IU hoops games, which I learned about from a guy at work. He got me on the e-mail list somehow. After I read the first one we talked, and he said "do you know about Peeks?" and I said "what?" He said "Peeks". I said "is that porn? He said no - "P-E-E-G-S dumbass - its a name. Some guy has a message board about IU basketball. I'll e-mail you the address."
It wasn't this one:
It wasn't even this one.
It was more "old timey internetty"
Substance over form.
Folks talking about IU hoops and recruiting, without the maternal sex.
What they called back then a "moderated message board".
Something like this:
only different.
I was a reader, not a poster.
I learned that was "lurking" , cause I'm smart and pick up on things like that.
And there were some names that were posting over and over and over.
Names I would see in the future.
Then something happened, and I was forced to lurk less and had to share my opinion:
I was agin that.
and it made posting hazardous.
Lemmings following each other off of cliffs.
Kool aid drinkers.
Lawsuits.
Midnight mailings.
People trying to get people fired.
People mailing crap to recruits.
People hatin.
THESE people:
My first meaningful post was a parody of Denny Crum hiding in the horse stables at the Kentucky State Fair, outside of Freedom Hall, using walkie talkies to signal plays to his former players being coached by Rick Pitina.
I was trying to support Mike Davis.
Rode that all the way to the crash site
Then,
unbeknownst to me, Peegs OK'd the creation of the OTF for folks who needed to escape the battle
It could be rough but it was obviously an on-line fraternity of smart assed folks say we come descended from monkeys! Even had one stunned.
So I lurked ...
until just the right moment...
when their blood was up ...
and they were on a roll ...
full throat insult mode ...
and I made my first OTF post:
"I hate everybody"
which drew first blood from Aruss
"?????"
and a "WTF?" from Dolfingus.
I revealed "I'm just trying to fit in"
and I disappeared.
but I had to lurk
where else could I find stuff like this:
or this
or better yet, this
My formal invitation came after my first milepost post, mile marker post, 5000th post.
I remember nothing about it.
But tunk (of all people) told me I should "post here more often."
I'm sure he regrets it.
For tunk:
Here, folks made confessions, told stories of colon explosions, attempted to make fun of the deaths of loved ones, begged for photos, voted for Megan, shared tuneage.
Here, I lost in the OTF Tourney to full frontal, then road head, then the ghey, then an off limit wife.
Here, I converse with commies, potheads, racists, crazy people, people who's posts bring the police to their house, dead-from-the-neck-up numbskulls, and , through it all
but that doesn't mean I wouldn't shoot you if I caught ya coming in the back door unannounced.
I've met a few of ya in person.
Liked everybody except ... well, you know who you are.
35,000 posts.
What a waste.
If you find yourself in jail in Louisville for a non-violent crime, I'll help raise bail money.
Are you not entertained?
Last word - listen to some hillbilly music now and then. It's good for the soul.
12-0.
Rose Bowl.
Vote for Megan!
