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Friday Funnies

sdhoosier

All-Big Ten
Dec 21, 2001
4,315
9,410
113
So Calif
A sad-looking man walks into a bar. He looks so down the bartender asks him, “Why the long face?”

The man replies dolefully, “I just found out my wife is sleeping with another man. I’ve decided I’m going to drink myself to death.”

The bartender is concerned to hear this and tells the man, “I’m sorry but I can’t help you kill yourself. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself.”

The man asks him, “Well what would you do in my situation?”

The bartender thinks for a moment and says, “Honestly, if I found out a guy was sleeping with my wife I wouldn’t sit around feeling sorry for myself or drinking myself to death, I’d kill the guy.”

The man leaps from his stool and shouts, “Hey, that’s a great idea! Thanks!” and runs out of the bar leaving the shocked bartender behind.

A couple hours later the man walks back into the bar with a smile on his face.

The bartender is nervous now. He’s afraid to ask but eventually says, “Did you kill the guy?”

The man says, “No, I slept with your wife! Whiskey please.”






and a chick...



55d209524ed6f7c2288c272801c6a56a.gif
 
A sad-looking man walks into a bar. He looks so down the bartender asks him, “Why the long face?”

The man replies dolefully, “I just found out my wife is sleeping with another man. I’ve decided I’m going to drink myself to death.”

The bartender is concerned to hear this and tells the man, “I’m sorry but I can’t help you kill yourself. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself.”

The man asks him, “Well what would you do in my situation?”

The bartender thinks for a moment and says, “Honestly, if I found out a guy was sleeping with my wife I wouldn’t sit around feeling sorry for myself or drinking myself to death, I’d kill the guy.”

The man leaps from his stool and shouts, “Hey, that’s a great idea! Thanks!” and runs out of the bar leaving the shocked bartender behind.

A couple hours later the man walks back into the bar with a smile on his face.

The bartender is nervous now. He’s afraid to ask but eventually says, “Did you kill the guy?”

The man says, “No, I slept with your wife! Whiskey please.”






and a chick...



55d209524ed6f7c2288c272801c6a56a.gif
Emily Elizabeth. Gosh darn.
 
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