ADVERTISEMENT

Friday Funnies

sdhoosier

All-Big Ten
Dec 21, 2001
4,234
8,888
113
So Calif
One day an Irishman, who has been stranded on a desert island for over ten long years, sees an unusual speck on the horizon.

"It's certainly not a ship," he thinks to himself. As the speck gets closer and closer, he begins to rule out the possibilities of a small boat, then even a raft.

Suddenly, emerging from the surf comes a drop dead gorgeous blonde woman wearing a wet suit and scuba gear.

She approaches the stunned man and says to him, "Tell me how long has it been since you've had a cigarette?"

"Ten years," replies the Irishman.

With that, she reaches over and unzips a waterproof pocket on her left sleeve and pulls out a pack of fresh cigarettes. He takes one, lights it, takes a long drag and says, "Faith and begorah! Is that good!"

"And how long has it been since you've had a sip of good Irish Whiskey?" she asks him.

Trembling, the castaway replies, "Ten years."

She reaches over, unzips her right sleeve, pulls out a flask and hands it to him. He opens the flask, takes a long swig and says, "Tis absolutely fantastic!"

At this point she starts slowly unzipping the long zipper that runs down the front of her wet suit, looks at the man and asks, "And how long has it been since you've played around?"

With tears in his eyes, the man falls to his knees and sobs, "Oh, Sweet Jesus! Don't tell me you've got golf clubs in there too."






and a chick....

barbie-9.png
 
cummingtonite_JPG-1.jpg


Cummingtonite, or Magnesium Iron Silicon Hydroxide ((Mg, Fe)7Si8O22(OH)2), is an inosilicate mineral. It shares its chemical formula with another mineral anthophyllite. Termed polymorphs, these two minerals share the same chemistry but have different structures. Diamond and graphite are the most famous polymorphism examples. One form of cummingtonite, amosite, is a rare asbestiform variety and can be therefore be used as asbestos.

Origins

The mineral takes its name from the town nearby which it was discovered in 1824: Cummington, Massachusetts.



Used in a Sentence:

Husband (Geologist) [thinking out loud whilst examining his dig findings]: “Hmmmm, I can’t quite decide if you’re cummingtonite or anthophyllite”

Wife: “I BEG YOUR PARDON?!?!”

Husband: “Don’t get excited dear, I was simply referring to this mineral”
 
  • Like
Reactions: kkott
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT